My parents were married young and they did all the best they could with the tools they had. They were the most hardworking parents who went from nothing to providing everything they could possibly do.
My mother from a young age was trained to fix light bulbs, to cook, clean, serve and communicate with everyone from all walks of life. She was a super kid and became a super mother who looked after more than 8 adults in one home, while looking after me. In today’s society this is unheard of – you don’t see mothers looking after people the way they used to. They’re more selfish and focused on their own than the rest of the family.
But there was something unique about my mother. She was the strongest member of our family but that isn’t to say she was unbreakable – we all are. Some of us hide it better than others. Mum was undoubtedly herself and when you’re different with a forward way of speaking and everyone is reserved, it isn’t easy to mix with a foreign family but she did. Throughout the whole process she was deteriorating for the sake of her husband (a man-child) and her kids. She sacrificed it all to have us.
I don’t think anyone else can compare to her. You aren’t like my mother. She looked after mothers, her sisters and supported her entire family, then supported her own family in addition to her in-laws and then had us. You can’t even come near to that unless you have experienced real hardship and supported more than an extended family.
Most of all, she was a teacher back home but was reduced to a TA here and still managed to look after everyone. Even my father had to repeat his education here, learn English and they were so impressed that someone from a village could be so strong in work.
On my dad’s 50th birthday I cried whole holding the mic and said “even if someone gave me a thousand pounds, it wouldn’t compare to what my parents did for me.” My parents paid for my MA, they drove me to school, let me stay at home after 18, cooked for me and did everything. While we just sat there and took everything for granted. We hurt her without realising she was deeply wounded.
Today let’s make a special prayer for our parents to acknowledge what they have done for us. Sometimes it is the thought that counts and not the gifts and today is that day. Until Valentine day comes and I will accompany my prayer with secret gifts!
“And out of kindness lower to them the wing of humility, and say “my Lord! bestow on them thy Mercy, even as they cherished me in childhood.” 17:24
Author: Jiya Raouf